We don’t ‘do’ Christmas. Years ago when the children were small, we tried. But we would get a knot in the pits of our stomach. A few years ago, the commercialism of it all used to be a huge bother to me…now I’ve pretty much accepted that is the way it is and I’m not gonna change the world but I can impact or influence my own family so I’ll stick to that. 😉
We have no problem with anyone who does celebrate Christmas though. For us, it is not a divisive issue – we are free to visit people and receive a gift (at the risk of our refusal offending them) and we are free not to. It isn’t an issue of salvation – our salvation is not dependent upon whether we celebrate Christmas or not.
Everything we do should be expressly Christ-centered; God-honoring.
We don’t talk much about it either as it is our walk, our decision, our beliefs and as is isn’t salvation dependent, there are more important issues to preach about! I have many discussions on forums about this and after receiving a personal email about it I thought I’d post here.
a) Why did you make the decision to not celebrate Christmas.
Firstly because of the commercialism but then because it all seemed to so empty and meaningless. We tried hard to think of ways to ‘put Christ back into Christmas’. Some people have said that there is no scriptural basis for celebrating the birth of Christ, but I don’t see that…I see that God desires us to teach our children His ways and he is into object lessons in a big way, so I don’t have a problem with doing things to remember the birth of Christ as it is all part of God’s redemptive story! We teach God’s story but we do it all the time. Plus the whole white Christmas thing is a bit over the top, especially as Aussies! 😉 We did try a few of the unit studies centred around Christmas and the symbols of Christmas, just in case I was being a stickler, but the more often we did them, the more the whole things stuck in my side and I couldn’t get past it. We tried doing Advent readings but I lost track of it all. We have read some of the books by Arnold Ytree but these are beautiful books that can be enjoyed at any time of the year! We’re about to start another one real soon.
When I went researching this whole thing a few years ago, I found some real loopy sites (be wary of what you allow your mind and heart to ingest) …some real genuine sites, some real genuine articles…but the more I read, the more confused I could sense I was getting. One could find a thousand articles against Christmas or celebrating it and another thousand articles for it…a lot of Scripture is thrown in there on both sides. What is one to do? I reckon its like most issues – we each need to seek God, study the Word and trust that in this, the Holy Spirit will lead you in all truth – John 14:26
‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.’
Matthew 15:8
It’s not something I think one can be convinced of – the Holy Spirit needs to convict us, we don’t need to be convinced by man. 🙂 I am glad that I am not saved because of this issue. I do believe that each person must seek God for themselves and not be lead my man’s teaching alone. God is our judge and He alone. I’m also glad that we are not bound by our stance with Christmas. Jesus gives us freedom, not bondage.
b) My family likes Christmas. I can’t not celebrate it. What can I do?
Rather than ask the question of should we or shouldn’t we, maybe we can ask God “how should we”? Sometimes a different question is the way that we can turn our ear and heart to hear His still, small voice. It’s really a matter of personal study, conviction and relating with God and His word. Do your own personal study. Learn the history of Christmas. It’s all very interesting.
If we take Christ out of everything Christmas, what would we do? What would we be left with? A get together, BBQ’s, presents, cards, holidays, lots of food, etc. If we take Christ out of everything Easter, what would we do? Take Christ out of Easter and you still have a holiday, eggs, chocolate, bilbies and lillies.
‘In vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrine the commandments of men.’
Matthew 15:9
I have taught my children how to bless me for Mother’s Day. I’ve taught them how to bless their Dad on Father’s Day. It is about honoring the person. (I teach my children to do this so they can bless and honor others- it isn’t all about me ;0) You wouldn’t honor me on Mother’s Day by giving me a drill and taking me to the hardware store! But you wouldn’t honor John by giving him a box of chocolates or a new PDA. 😉 You would consider the person who is due the honor. In what way would they want to be honored?
We should consider how God wants to be honoured. The things that are honoring to God are the songs we sing, the prayer we pray, the Scriptures we read, the talks we have, the way in which we live and breathe. But these things are to be done all the time or regularly as worship. If we want to have a get together with lots of food and give presents then we can- we don’t need to make an excuse which we think and the world says, is about Christ, when it really isn’t about Christ. The way the world treats Christmas (generalisation) is often nothing more than self indulgence! The world loves Christmas time with all its celebrations. Holidays, food, gifts, etc. Yet it denies the very one whom it is supposedly about! Oh it’s okay to remember Christ as a babe but not the Saviour of the Human race. For many, it is just about *me*. That is largely how the world sees it.
Don’t love the world’s ways. Don’t love the world’s goods. Love of the world squeezes out love for the Father. Practically everything that goes on in the world?wanting your own way, wanting everything for yourself, wanting to appear important?has nothing to do with the Father. It just isolates you from him. The world and all its wanting, wanting, wanting is on the way out?but whoever does what God wants is set for eternity.
1 John 2:15-17
So, if Christmas is going to be something that you do, then how you do it needs to be considered. Who is it about? Why are you doing it? When are you doing it? What will you do? Where will you do it? And how will you go about it? (Sorry my little brain uses the 5 W’s and H) If it is the Lord you are seeking to honor, then go to Him and see how He would be honored? (Like the Father’s Day principle 😉 See, I did have a point in there somewhere)
I know these thoughts are not for everyone, and that’s okay. This is our walk and our journey. But I also want you to know that we don’t judge other’s for celebrating the birth of Jesus the Messiah.
A few links:
Spurgeon on Christmas
The Christmas Irony
What does Jesus want for Christmas
When there is crisis at Christmas
Christmas and Advent
The Babe who will not be tamed
We did this Christmas quiz a few years ago and we’ll go through it again this year.
Is Christmas Necessary?
Robin Sampson’s article: Holiday Dilemma’s.
It was good to read your post on Christmas. I had a dilemma over this last year but came to the conclusion that NO MAN was going to convict me on ANY issue! I don’t see Christmas as a “christian” celebration but for me personally it is a joyful family time and more than anything I love to see our kitchen overflowing with family members sharing a meal!
Because the central theme for me is “family fellowship” I must add that we also enjoy celebrating other events during the year in the same manner; Passover, Shabbat (as often as we can), and many other Jewish celebrations. I guess we are just a celebrating kind of family!
Bless Ya x
We view Christmas in much the same way as Jacqui has mentioned. We don’t really do the gifts thing too much (dd loves to get a little thing or two), but I do enjoy the getting together with family side of things. We have started a tradition of going out for a nice (usually expensive, gulp) meal on the day… a buffet type thing. It has a nice feel the to day, and we also visit with family over the Boxing Day period etc.
I have been studying about the Feasts more and more lately, and have really come to realise the importance of those in our lives as Christians…. not even to have to have a feast as such, but to know the reasons behind them. They are immensely and vitally important as they are a very prophetic picture of everything concerning Jesus. How sad it has taken me this long to know this?!!! The Church needs to get back to the teachings of our Jewish forefathers. Ooops, I am hijacking your blog my darling, but we share don’t we?? LOL,
love
Amanda
Hi I agree with much of what has been mentioned, for us well our Christmas will be humble!! But we enjoy the craft leading up to Christmas as we explore the true meaning together with the girls. We are’nt huge on making a big issue of it all as the world does but we do make Jesus the focus!and we do make gifts forged with love for each other.
Bless ya
Hi Susan
Last year was our first year not to “do” Christmas. We told all the family, and explained the reasons to anyone who would listen. It felt like such a burden was taken off me not to have to stress over Christmas, but I hated hurting the extended family. I thought the first year would be hardest but now the family are again asking what we want for Christmas etc!!! I am not emotionally strong enough at the moment to go through this again, I think I will just cop out and do the email thing. It will be harder as just before Christmas we will be moving next door to my parents. Anyway, good to hear of another who has gone along this path before me.
I have been reading all your blog posts but haven’t been commenting as life has become a bit overwhelming recently.
I think it was only last year that I discovered that Susan & I think the same on this issue. I think it’s a testament to Susan that though we lived in the same time for a while, it never really came up. She certainly doesn’t push her view in your face and is gracious about her position. We like to see this as a good opportunity to spend time with family and each year gets easier, Emma.
So, Jocelyn, you do still get together with family? How do you manage that side of things? I wouldn’t mind so much but the whole materialism of the day gets out of hand and gives me a bad feeling inside. So we decided just to stay home last Christmas. We even did school that day LOL! I honestly didn’t miss Christmas, although I have always before looked forward to it and enjoyed it (apart from the stress of the gift-giving/shopping and receiving). I felt relieved. The only thing that bothers me is the extended family issue.
The first year we went without presents, we still met with all of my family for Christmas lunch. They did all of their present stuff in the morning. My family is now scattered to the four winds so we don’t really catch up then anyway. I think my mum finds it hard. I try to ring her on Boxing Day to ask if she had a nice Chrissy.
My dh’s family don’t celebrate Christmas. Well, his parents and brother’s families don’t. His sisters now do as they have married into other families. Those who don’t go into everything, still have lunch together.
I think it’s important to still spend time with family (if they are around) on either Dec 25 or 26. They need to know that it’s not about them but about the reasons you have given for not celebrating. My family don’t understand our position but they respect it and there’s no animosity as we have tried to make it a time for family when we can.
Hi Emma and Jocelyn,
While we don’t ‘do’ Christmas because of our convictions, as Jocelyn says, it is still important to our extended family. While we are free in Christ, this means we are free not to celebrate Christmas but we aren’t bound by not celebrating it either. As we live away from family we don’t always see them. We were last with family a few years ago and will be again this year.
A few years ago, they have a big family get together and exchange presents. We attend. We have family fun. We don’t give presents, much to the disgust of some family members. However, this has also meant that our children don’t receive as elaborate a gift as the other children. So be it! That’s fine with us anyway. If we were to give gifts, it would be because it is in our hearts to do so- not because of the 25th December. My family doesn’t ask what they can get the children. If they can’t think of something, they’ll just give them some money in a card. I would be perfectly happy not to have them receive anything but this would be very offensive to my family. (Think: Italian family) It is offensive enough that we don’t give gifts and do the whole Christmas thing…to deny them the opportunity to give to our children would be insulting to them, not to us but to them. So again, we try to discern the who, and why we do what we do. Is it a matter of law? What is it exactly we are trying to impart to the children? Why are we not celebrating Christmas? If it is because it goes against God’s commands and we would be sinning, then that will dictate our actions. If it is because we do not recognise the day or esteem that day as higher than other’s then that too will dictate how we act and behave.
Our society says that we get recognised public holidays so it is a good time to get together with family. I think it would be silly of ‘us’ (I really mean us, as in the personal sense) to deliberately avoid these get togethers as it is the only opportunity for us to see everyone. It is the time of year when everyone attends, so we do try to as well. To us, it is a time where our family can get together- like at weddings or funerals.
Actually, it’s quite strange. We are the only Christians (believers/followers of Jesus) in our family. We’re also the only ones who don’t do Christmas. Tehee, family can’t quite figure us out! 😉
Blessings,
Susan <><
Thanks Susan for the wisdom and insight on this difficult topic. This topic is usually avoided. I believe discussing it helps everyone.
Th Hebrew iron sharpening iron discussions should be practiced more in the Christian community–disagreeing and remaining friends.
Thank you
Thanks Robin,
I have also shared your blog post on our Aussie forum, giving all proper credit via links to you.
We “do” Christmas although as far as my NAna is concerned we don’t really celebrate Christmas because we don’t have a jolly man in a red suit visiting our house and we usually have the “Day” (or most of the day) as family time for those in our household. We get together with my family on Christmas Eve and with DH’s family alternating Christmas dinner or Boxing Day lunch (working in with BIL’s wife’s family LOL!)
We do presents but in no way go overboard.
My personal challenge is buying presents for extended family. We have a small budget and I find it stressful to buy them each a present that fits into our $10 pp budget… I’m constantly rethinking how to do this but I know that no matter what I do most of my side of the family will buy anyway.
Susan some of the links in this post are now dead. The “great christmas ideas” and the quiz one at least.
Thanks Liz, I have updated them now. 🙂
thank you precious woman for speaking on my behalf inyour humble but meaningful way. Sometimes another person words a conversation better than the one who tries too hard!(myself ). When the Lord saved me from (hell) & all the worldly /pagan customs I “celebrated’ with my family, He opened my eyes to see Why, How, When, and Who?…..I don’t judge those who celebrate Dec,25th as Christ’s birthday, but I do feel sorry for them because I once was like that, seeing it through the eyes of the world— but now I see it through the eyes of God(from reading the meaning of it all) through His word…..I just wish that others may see that just because we don’t celebrate in festivities eg, putting up/decorating a ‘tree’, or taking a photo with ‘Santa'(I have another name for that character), or giving presents or singing Jingle Bells etc it doesn’t mean we are cultic, or ‘unchristianlike’ or offensive..It’s just a choice being made for the better now that our eyes have been opened to discern….and Christ’s birth, life and death and RESURRECTION is celebrated each day when on my knees I worship the King of Kings & Lord of Lords who deserves all the decorations of praise upon His head and the song that I sing be sweet to His ears & the thanks for His redemption when He bought me at a price that no present or Santa or world could afford!!.That’s Christmas, every day for me!