Cast your mind back to the year 1988. There I am, a newly married 18year old girl, with an instant family (son). We honeymooned in Tasmania, during the cold month of July. And it was the best! Nothing gets a couple closer than sharing a Kombi van for a month. It was during this time, that my husband introduced me to the world of cooking! Yes, he cooked me my first ever packet of 2 minute noodles. It was a had-to-be-there moment.
Anyway… we returned to South Australia and moved into my son’s mother’s house. Yes… even as an 18yo life wasn’t to be easy. We moved into her house. At least we would have our own furniture, right? Bom bom. Not so. They, being my son’s mum and her husband, gave us our bedroom furniture and dining room suite. It’s just furniture you say? Try telling that to a newly married 18yod girl. Anyway, I digress. They were to be some of our dearest friends, as life would have it, glory to God.
I was newly married and, naturally I wanted to create a beautiful home for my new husband. Not so easy to achieve when one is on a ridiculous (read that as ‘unemployed, out-of-work youth pastor) budget. I bought many Country Homes magazines from the op shop (Opportunity shop) but after awhile I had collected so many magazines that I couldn’t keep track of my favourite pictures. So, I bought a paper scrapbook (and I mean old time scrapbook – nothing like the scrapbooks of today!) and cut out my favourite picutres and posted them into my scrapbook. That was my version of today’s concept of the Inspiration Board or… Pinterest. I would collect the magazine pictures in my scrabook to show John, and we would dream together. I scoured the op shops, looking for quirky, vintage, unique items to make my house a home. Those were the days when I knew the best Vinnies in town, the Goodwill that had the better vintage items… the Salvo’s that just had everything cheap! Those were the days. And then vintage became popular. That kinda killed it for us.
Fast forward a couple of years to where we lived in a shed and a bus. (Hands up if you knew we lived in a shed for 18months) After having one child born in the shed, I was working part time managing the service station where we both worked. Plus ministry. Plus a 10 acre block of land.Plus 2 dogs, 2 horses, goats, sheep, a cocky and a ram! I found myself pregnant again! Yay!!! But, knowing that the shed was not a desirable nor practical environment for raising two babies we abandoned the dream of our mud brick home (sob sob) and instead went with a transportable house and a [low] mortgage. Even though I had to let go of one dream I still kept many others. I still kept my scrapbook, filled with beautiful, dreamy pictures of ideas that I one day hoped to own or recreate in my own house.
Reality Hits
Whilst designing and building our transportable home, I realised, albeit slowly, that we couldn’t afford all the grandiose ideas that I had pasted away and drooled over. Reality check! Over the months, God spoke to me… reminding me of what was near and dear to my heart. But that’s okay, I thought. One day they will happen. Right?
Fast Forward
Twenty four years later and we are a little better off (financially) than when we first started. Praise God! But you know what? Reality bites. Hard. With sharp teeth! Especially when one chooses to be a one income family that focusses on relationship more so than possessions. I stopped my ‘home scrapbook’. I stopped collecting Country Home magazines. I stopped drooling. I had to.
All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor.
1 Corinthians 10:23-24 ESV
My Weakness Is Not Your Weakness
My weakness is consumerism, coveting pretty things and hoarding, along with envy. Aside from being sin, this leads to discontent. And it’s horrible to live with. But I found that it is quite easy to replace my real life with a virtual one, and that includes collecting and drooling over things online – a virtual hoarding of sorts. Sites like Clipix and Pinterest still foster materialism, desire and discontent in my heart. Seeing these sites filled with the most gorgeous pictures is almost like home porn. It doesn’t encourage my heart toward godly things. I am not compelled to be satisfied with less. See my weakness? I know many friends who use these sites as inspiration to be creative in their own lives, kitchens and homeschools without struggling with the temptations that I do. I am truly happy for them but their strength is my weakness.
Why I Do What I Do On The Internet
Playing with various social media has allowed me to examine why I don’t like some sites and why I prefer others. I’ve learned that I prefer forums and Facebook. For me, forums and facebook are my virtual community and these tools foster relationships. My friends live at AussieHomeschool and Facebook. Relationships are cultivated there. Words are obviously how I connect relationally with others.
So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.
1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV
The Pintervention
I read books by the Puritans. I listen to guys like John Piper, John MacArthur and Paul Washer. I can’t then head over to Pinterest and drool. I just can’t. I know I sound like one of those missionaries that puts everyone on a guilt trip (~smile~) but really I’m not. I’m not telling you what to think or what to pin, I’m telling you of my weakness. I needed to go cold turkey. No trifling around with sin. I deleted my Pinterest account.
Calling
I desire to focus on others. My heart is sinful and it is very easy for me to focus on myself and my needs or my wants. This isn’t in line with Christ’s calling. It’s not part of dying to self. There are people all over the world who are suffering and dying. Now may not be my time to proactively be out there and serving them but I do hope that one day it will be the right time. Pinterest does not encourage me to follow Christ, deny myself, take up my cross and follow Him. (Matthew 16:24)
As a woman who has limited energy and yo-yo health, I find it exhausting. Planning, dreaming, shopping, lists and purchasing is fun, exciting and sometimes even an adrenaline rush (when you get a bargain). But then I bring it home and then devote even more energy as I store it, use it, wash it, insure it, rearrange it, etc. Maybe the 9 house moves in 10 years really knocked me around but I am tired of being controlled by my stuff!
I want to be content, happy, satisfied right here, right now!
And so, I took out a Pintervention upon myself. Aside from the whole violation of copyright issues which are for another time, these are the reasons that I had a check in my spirit… a prompting, no a directive from the Holy Spirit to stay away from Pinterest. And that’s all I would encourage others to do… to seek the Lord and follow His direction. That will look different to the path that I and others are on because we all have different strengths and weaknesses. But Our Father knows us best. He knows what we need, what is best for us and what we should avoid. Which is why we should follow Him.
Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:11-13 ESV
This is a marvellous post! As you know, ahem, I do not do Pinterest, but the principle is the same for all of us. Are we making good choices in light of our profession. Speaking of choices a lot with my boys at the moment. What I loved also in this post is the peek into your life and family and learning more about you. We all have past lives, highlights and maybe even skeletons 🙂 I enjoy learning more about my friends. As you say, and I have also mentioned in my last post, friendship over the net can be special and require nuturing.
Thank you Ruby. Skeletons? We all have them, including myself. Hehee, I wondered if anyone would notice the few that I unleashed in this post. Yes, blogging and forums do for me that which Pinterest can never do.
I deleted mine a couple of days ago, when the copyright things came about. I know some people can use it just for recipes and stuff, but I am too visual and get addicted to aesthetics. I have come to accept my house will never look like the show houses I pinned, and I know my style, and there really is no need to even look anymore. Possessions can be destroyed in a matter of seconds, and God has loosened my grip on them lately even more. So, I hear ya!
How true Marisa… I will admit that the whole copyright issue was the catalyst for me. It’s just not worth the risk. Yet on the other hand, the copyright issue is whole different story to the battle that rages in my heart.
I could see from a mile off that pinterest would be a huge time suck for me. Just adding more things to keep me on the computer when I’ve got much better things to be doing off it. So I never signed up. Like you, not condemning others who do use it but just knowing what it would be for me.
Glad for you that you’re taking control of things and not the other way round 🙂
Thanks for stopping by Rebecca. 🙂
Thank you for talking a bit about your early marriage. My husband and I are under a lot of pressure at the moment, our families expect us to be perfect, they think we’re doing something wrong if we aren’t living ‘comfortably’, and every time we make a mistake and accidentally tell them they get upset at us and think we’re idiots, expecting us to have the knowlege, experience, and means of 50 year olds, not 20 year olds. Andrew quit his job where he was very unhappy and soon to be made redundant to start his own business, and programming project, and some other projects that, in the long term, could really pay off. We have food and even our own (rented) roof, we’re not badly off, but all our family sees is that we are not as well off as they are, forgetting that we are only just starting out, plus our priorities are different. We have no support, they think we’re being stupid and irresponsible, they seem to not remember that they, too, had their tough times and times when they did the opposite of what their parents did when it came to money.
I’m starting to finally realise that what they think dosen’t matter, their priorities don’t matter, we know we’re doing the right thing for our family and we’re alright, It’s very comforting to be reminded that we are definitly not the first young couple who struggled to get by as they began to get established. Not everyone expects a young, single income couple to be living in their own home, in fact pretty much the only people that do seem to be our parents.
Tough times? These are tough times… especially for young marrieds. I think it’s always tough being newly married because as exciting and fresh as it all is, it has its own set of challenges. Your right Abba, it is your priorities that matter most to you. Naturally you can be respectful to other people and gracious when dealing with them but the bottom line is- it’s your marriage. and, as wives our first and foremost duty and love and interests need to be toward our hubbies (after God, of course).
I know it’s scary but good on Andrew for leaving his job. (Gasp!) Honestly, it might be better for him to do it now than later on in say, 10 years time. It’s easy for me to say, “Oh stay where you are, doing that boring, horrid job for the next 20 years” when it’s not me who has to do it every day. That’s why I try to support my man in whatever he wants to do… and he’s done the same for me. God normally sorts each of us out, whenever we need it. 😉
It’s funny but I have always had the impression that, for a young woman, you are *so together*! You are so bright and gracious and emotionally intelligent. I actually think that about most young married women I meet these days. I feel like I bumbled around… not very confident, unsure of everything and very naive was I. You come across so differently.
I’m looking at starting a new weekly series of posts here at my blog. For me, about me… but as my children are getting older I enjoy relating the stories of how John and I came to be. 🙂
Love you Susan……..you are amazing……….you are obedient………you are encouraging……………..you are the master not the servant…………….I have always admired your ability to “see” things………….I love how you make me think deeper1
I guess I am just a simple creature, I never have thought too deeply, more reactionary………….
You know Pintrest is different for me it is an unending source of universal inspiration……..also I am not so worried about the copyright stuff as much, that is an evolving beast.
Like you say, we all see, hear and do things differently, I respect and admire you for being so gutsy and determined to stay pure and right………
Thank God we all see and do things differently the world sure would be sooooooooooooo drop dead boring if we did not.
Your friend with or without a Pintrest Account
Cathy
Thank you sweet Cathy,
You know I had you in mind when I wrote,
Eek! Imagine a world where everything was in grey or orange or worse, blue? 🙂
Ohhhhh but there are so many shades of blue……….Avatar proves that…………wow blue skin…….I could come to blue skin, it is my favourite colour!!!!
True true, I can see it that way if I imagine the entire world as various shades of purple, lilac and lavender… but I pity everyone else. I’m with you- I”m glad there are all different folks and strokes 😉
Susan, does this mean I need to friend you on fb or become more active on the ahs forums to be your friend ? 🙂 I am very inactive on both lol!
Anyway, back to your post, you are absolutely right – our weaknesses are unique to us and its so important to be mindful of that isn’t it!
I did notice a few things in this post you “unleashed” but then I do tend to take notice of minor details and I think you’ve talked about some of them in the past or made reference to them so they weren’t totally new to me:)
I look forward to hearing more about you and John ….
Your bloggy friend
Rosemary:)
Susan, I really do think we are long lost twins. I started married life with a suitcase and a house furnished with cast offs from my mother in law. 20 years and 5 moves on I am living in a old cottage which is in the middle of major renovations. I did the scrapbook as well and envied those who had a real home. It isn’t easy, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but I am slowly learning not to look at the things of the world, but to look at God and see his provision. When I get really down I remind myself how much better off I am then a lot of people in the world. Relationship is more important every time.